My Butt Says No

After a terrible dream last night, I barely pulled myself out of bed to attend my first class of the day- English Research and Writing. This class, well, sucks not because I have a hatred for writing (if I did you wouldn't be reading this) but it is the fact that I have to write a ten page paper on my major. Great. Something already rock to and fro about day to day deciding whether it's right for me and now I have to put together some thoughts about it on parchment for a grade. Times like these i wish i lived in the pioneer days...and once I think of the measles and small pox, I jump right back into 2005.

I am trying to pinpoint what it is that seems to rock my socks when it comes to my major and the worries and hyperveinilating. Slowly, I think I am getting a grip on some of the issues.

1. Intimidation- Sure it sounds cheesy, but it's pretty true. I look at other works and see hwo cool they are, how cretive they appear, and then it hits me how small I m in the world and how much their talent exceeds my own. Not really a good characterisitic to have right now, but I am working on it. As my friend Kristin reminds me "You are only a freshman in college. It seems you want to plan everything out for the next four years in your second semester of college. I'd suggest taking it easy." Which is very true, I have made it a goal for the year of 2005 to quit fretting about any matter than comes to mind. In fact, 2005 is shaping up to be pretty great so far. (Knock on wood)

2. Role Confusion- I take a look at all the graphic designers in the world and I begin to sterotype. From that point on, all of my deocrations and lifestyle doesn't fit in at all with the life of a graphic designer. In my mind (scary place to begin with), graphic designers were high heels all day, live on meager wages, are a little on the metal side with "art thinking and man, you know, dude, thoughtful stuff, go hippi vans" way of thinking, and their living space is cold and uncomfortable. I'm trying to get rid of this one too.

Interest- I am still trying to find out if it's what I'm destine to do or not. Some days I feel like it's the best thing in the world as I design a poster for a friend or play around on the computer, and other days I feel like I've made a drastic mistake being enrolled in college for this major and all these programs I am using are so much bigger than I. Since we are starting a new project in QuarkXPress, I hope i will find some glimmer of hope for my personal feelings and the outlook on this major.

What would I do instead? Beats me. (really it does, it comes into my room at night and takes some of my heavy textbooks I paid out the butt for and gives me a good beating) My other possiblity is some time of high school counselor who helps out people with their plans, but then again, how am I suppost to do that when I am still confused as what to do?

I think it's time for me to stop worrying, I guess you could call it worrying, and put my nose to the grindstone for another week of school. Thankfully we have tomorrow of because of a blessed "Reading Day" that is working into the schedule for who knows what reason but I will be the last one complaining about a day off. I'm more than ready for have normal dreams. On the cheery side, my bowling team is picking up their trophies, t-shirts, and having our picture taken since we were champs for last semester. Also, I am going out to visit my Aunt in Cleveland this weekend. Yea!

Enjoy the day!

Quizzes For Entertianment

I always love a good suvey or quiz. I'm not sure why, but hey, it's worth a shot.

You are a WRCF--Wacky Rational Constructive Follower. This makes you a Paul Begala.You are unflappable and largely unconcerned with others' reactions to you. You were not particularly interested in the results of this test, and probably took it only as a result of someone else asking you to. You have a biting wit and intense powers of observation. No detail is lost on you, and your friends know it--relying on you to have the facts when others express only opinions. You are even-tempered, friendly, and educated. Foolish strangers may mistake your mildness for weakness--they will be surprised.You entire approach to life is enviable. You will raise good kids.

Spill

I love the idea of people giving topics to write about. (Golly, I'm surprised I still have people coming to this site to read). Everyone is welcome to posting an idea or several even for me to write about; questions comments, or concerns.

Have a super Saturday!

I am my cousin's cousin

I found this on another blog and decided to open a can of worms! Here's to you Sharon and your love for little quizzes and such! Enjoy!

1. If you could have dinner with anyone in history, who would it be?

That's a hard one, but I would have to say Helen Keller or any biblical people

2. List three things you want to learn to do:

1. Take care of a car
2. Any kind of sewing
3. Cook more than toast

3.Using only one word, describe yourself as a child:

Creative

4.What is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you?

Wow, hard one. I will use the most recent event: My mother found her old gag can of mixed nuts which is actually a spring that pops out at you when you unscrew the container. Needless to say, I fell for it and resonded in appropriate manner: Screamed like a little girl and threw the thing out of my hands.

5. Have you ever been to a seance? If not, would you go to one?

No, and I don't know.

6. Would you rather make-out with Bert or Ernie?

Eww, that is just wrong. But if I were a muppet, I guess I might go for Bert. Maybe he has a compassionate heart from all that pigeon loving he does.

7. How much are your secrets worth?

More than any money you have! Muahaha! Actually, I don't know. I forget a lot of things, so maybe they are more valueable than one would think because those secrets are limited editions- they go back into the archives at any moment.

8.Have you ever pretended to be someone you aren’t?

Holy Cow, probably yes, but not in a scary or scamming kind of way. But i have spoken french to telemarketers before...

9. When is the last time you were tipsy?

Excuse me?! Tipsy? Probably when I was sick and loaded with all kinds of medication.

10. What is the strangest dream you’ve ever had?

I cannot even answer that question because my dreams are SOMETHING ELSE. Each one is nuts in it's own little way. I could never compare or rate them. They are are precious and rare creations by my brain.

11.If you had to change the custom of shaking hands, what would you replace it with?

Heads smacking together

Add one question to this:

12. Which do you prefer to vomit in? Sink or toliet?

Hmm...I don't know. Toliet is proper edicate but sinks are closer and at my level. Undecided.

Secret Night Expectancies

Due to the ugly illness that attacked Kristin a few days ago, she was unable to make the trip, thus, making us reconsider our plans because Cleveland without her would break her heart, not to mention how much we would miss her company (and direction giving skills).

Instead of heading across the boarder to Ohio for eats at the best Italian restaurant in the city, the group of five, including me, settled for the ever popular Olive Garden in Erie. It was both me and Jen’s first time to the joint that we had heard so much about. After waiting a half hour, which isn’t so bad for a Friday night, we were seated and enjoyed fellowship and good old girl time, something I have missed since high school. The girly giggles and laughing that make you stop and wonder what on earth is going on and why you are laughing like a hyena that is shown on the Animal Planet station. We all received our fill of fancy food, fettuccini alfredo for moi, and some even ordered dessert to take home with them. Since I’m dirt poor and ordered something cheap on the menu, I decided to stick to my stingy creed and pass it up. Besides, a tasty dessert titled “Chocolate Lasagna” wouldn’t be that ideal for someone who just started a new work out regiment.

From there we hustled back into the frozen tundra and drove over to the mall to kill time before our 10:00 movie at the dollar theater (which is really $1.50. Cheap, I know). We stopped over at a bookstore and mingled around at the books and sun stuff in the store. As long as the location was warm, we didn’t care. Some of the gang left with purchases of all sorts.

From there it was off to the movie theater to watch “Shall We Dance” starring Richard Gere and Jennifer Lopez. Of course, it was a pure chick flick and had it’s cheesy moments, but overall, it wasn’t that bad. But I’m not one of those Richard Gere stalkers who adore all of his films, even the ones that have faltered. That’s more my mother’s era, I believe.

After the tale, we stopped at everyone’s favorite store- Wally World A.K.A. Wal-Mart to pick up a thermometer for Kristin. After the other Jen and I waited for a long period of time in line (since there were only three registers open) I placed the thermometer on the conveyor belt which caused the older male cashier to say “Uh oh!” when he looked at it before he scanned it. Assuming he thought I was the one ill, I replied “Oh, I’m not the one sick”. He took another glance at it and apologized and laughed for he thought the item was something else- a pregnancy test. Jen could hardly keep her composure as we finished out our “scanky” transaction. Finally we bolted out the door in laughter. Therefore, I have composed a list of things that are essential actions to take when trying to discover if one is pregnant:

1. Dress yourself up, put on your make-up, jazz up the hair, and get together with all your friends. Who knows when you might need their support. Besides, you’re young and possibly pregnant; you didn’t get there by staying in on Friday nights.
2. Go out to a fancy and tasty restaurant to eat because everyone knows that mothers need to eat well when they are “with child”. Just pass up the wine when they come to the table with the samples.
3. Go to chick flick movie to give yourself hope that the father is just like the handsome male portrayed in the film, if you can remember what the guy looks like…darn it…does have brown hair or blond hair? I just can’t remember…
4. Finally, drive over to Wal-Mart at around midnight to avoid seeing anyone you know and discreetly purchase a pregnancy test with your friends. The more the merrier! Happy testing!

So after all of the excitement, Meagan (fellow Rose Hall dweller) and I scurried over in the wicked blast of sub-zero temperature weather back to the dorms. Off to bed I go, because it’s already 2:02, I’ve been chilling here for an hour now but I don’t feel tired at all. Maybe it’s the Coldplay songs that are on my Media Player. Who knows, but I’ll give sleep a chance. Tomorrow is a whole new day (and I won’t pay attention to the fact that it is already Saturday).

G’night!

Bear or Bare Suits?

Times like these I wish I was an over-weight, furry, blubber insulated polar bear. It was -2 this morning with a wind chill of -2. Honestly, the cool and crisp air on my face felt like a hundred little needles pricking themselves into my face. Times like these take me back to the days where I went to class with a sweat shirt, I wore t-shirts, and I didn’t have to power walk my way to class because there wasn’t a chance of one of my limbs freezing off. Every now and then I take a look at the snow and pretend its sand. Then I begin to miss Florida.

I traveled down to Vero Beach, Florida this past summer with Wuvor. Many of his relatives reside there so we decided to take the trip and I would finally get my change to see the beach for the first time. I really did love it. I actually didn’t want to come home. The beach was great with its smooth waves that you could ride or the sand that was everywhere when you returned home into the air conditioning.

Wuvor asked me if I would mind going back to Florida for Christmas. At first, I totally disagreed because Christmas to me has snow, family, and tradition. I turned down the idea and asked if we could possibly go this summer. Yet in my intercultural communications class, I find myself day dreaming about Florida, even around the holidays. It’s one of those classes that make you feel compelled to do something out of the ordinary after you leave. For instance, after my Women’s wellness and fitness class I have the urge to go out and run a mile right then and there. “Let’s sprint over there! Tone that muscle!” Of course, that is a great benefit of that class since my roommate and I have made plans to exercise for an hour each day. But when I leave Intercultural communications, I feel like seeing the world and experiencing new cultures and a new pattern of life. I told wuvor this but then it dawned on me that the Christmas of 05 will be much different than this past Christmas. It will be the first “official” Christmas without Grandpa, which makes me believe that my family won’t let me take the trip to Florida and rather have me home for the holidays. I haven’t thought about it much after that, mostly because I would rather go in the summer because of the extra warmth (something I could really go for right about now). Besides, if I stick to the regiment of exercise and winsor pilates, I ought to be in prime shape to be hopping around in my favorite bathing suit. (I just have to choose which one it is, I own about four of them…)

But for now, I’m focuses on the day ahead (without classes) and the trip to Cleveland tonight with the Potter’s house ministry gals. Yes, Cleveland. It’s a night out on the town as we go out to some place called “Booka do Bepo’s” to eat a huge meal of food that is realtivly cheap when you bring a gang of people with you. I’ll take my camera…

Mustang Lindsay

Since Sharon wrote about her near-death experience on the road, I decided to write about some of mine and some of the fun occurrences in the good old automobile.

My first instance is much like Sharon’s, only less death-defying and heart stopping. I was on my way to work and as I traveled along the two lane highway a truck, much like a construction truck but not huge, was in my lane driving towards me. Luckily I saw it far enough ahead and slowed down as I tried to figure out what the heck this bimbo was up to. Then has he moved into the other lane, I saw he was passing a car, and also had the courtesy to blow his horn at me as if I were on the wrong side of the road. I would have returned the beep, but I was too dumb-founded to even process what had just happened before my eyes.

Another instance involves the snow. I finally got my license October of 2003, and the second day of work. So I was able to scurry off the work and not have to bother ma ma to come and fetch me from Franklin Village Mall every other day. Of course, winter was not too far away, and John and I had just started dating. Back in the day when I had 30 minutes breaks I would drive over to his house to visit briefly and then drive back to work since he lived close by. Little did I know that his driveway would have fun turning my car sideways as I slid down it or getting me stuck in some awkward position. You must understand, his driveway is something like 60 degree angle, so it’s pretty “uphilly” you might say. This fact causes lots of fun in the winter months. You know it’s bad when both of his parents where stuck in the driveway this past weekend and just gave up, parked the car, and walked to the house, thus, trapping John in because his car was at the top.

Lastly, I recall the incident of the cat. Animals sure do throw in a batchful of fun when they approach the pavement. It’s so scary to even see chipmunks or frogs on the road. To me, if it’s moving and it’s on the road and it isn’t made of metal and four rubber tires, it’s alive and a danger. As I drove home from John’s one night (Do you see a pattern? Haha) I encountered a pure black cat. But this encounter was brief because kitty decided to would be fun to dart in front of me at the last second; just missing its tail from being squashed by my tires. I laid the rubber in hopes of avoiding the critter and giving it a chance at life to use the 8 lives it had now instead of nine. Kitty did make it out alive, but I was crazy in the car. If I could have found that cat, I would have sat him down and had a long talk with him.

I’m not a terrible driver, nor am I tomorrow’s next Driver’s Ed instructor. But sometimes you do have to wonder if some people actually passed Driver’s Education. And other times, you just have to remain calm and ride the wave; hopefully it’s a smooth one.

Gosh, It's like so totally cool!

I dedicate this blog to Ashley. who warms my heart each time we talk.

After a Tuesday that produced more drama than Monday, I needed a pick me up of some kind. By the end of last night, I felt like I let relationships down, failed trying to figure out the worlds problems. and feeling helpless and nothing more than a bystander at times. It was truly a Monday in disguise. But thank goodness for the Gathering.

The Gathering is like youth group for the college student. Since I fell in love with mine during those teenages years of the past, I greatly enjoy the Gathering. Sure, I don't know everyone there in attendance, but I am learning names and faces each time. One of the great benefits to such a get together is those people you meet. One of these is Ashley.

She loves everything and giggles. Being around her is quite a blessing as you sit and talk to her and share stories of the day and watching her rosy red cheecks swell and laughing right along with her. When she gets all excited she exclaims phrases that run along the lines of "Gosh, it's like totally cool!" Her laughing and cheery smiles warm my heart, espically after a long day of all kinds of drama. I say thank you to her and to the many others I have met through Campus Ministries that brighten my day. I only hope that I may brighten their's as well.

Now it's back to class. Unfortunatly, my most boring class is at times my Intro to computer softare, which deals with my major. It just might be the instuctor, I hope it's nothing fatal as far as not being cut out for this major. But now that we are working on an real project and doing something constructive, I think the class rating will improve.

The Moon Says It All

Sometimes you just have to look up into the sky to find your answers, or at least the reason things are so screwy. It's a full moon today.

I remember back to the days when Grandpa was living with us. My mother dreaded the full moon because of the crazy and abnormal behavior my grandfather would display that day. He'd be boucing off the walls, saying something out of the blue, or trying to move around the house like a spring chicken. When the full moon pops it's head onto the calander, it was time to crack open a bottle of asprin.

I don't know what it is, whether it's the fact that it's a full moon, or a Monday, or both, but today just isn't on the ball. In fact, the day is just getting trampled by the bouncing ball. or being chased by it and just can't seem to get a lead. There really isn't nothing new to report other than the fact that the Monday's are in full swing and I decided to work out in the room today. It's 10 degrees outside. Hopefully it will warm up someday before I make plans to catch the next plane leaving for Key West or the tropical Coral Reef.

Stay warm!

Pub Funnin'

A night out on the town! I joined a new found friend of mine from The Gathering (college church get-together) along with Manna to Uncle Charlie's, a local pub/resturant/hang out. There I met a person who knows all about my church because he attends a Church of God in Cambridge Springs. Small world! This picture is of him doing what they call "The Pretzel". Nothing like a college education!1

Good to the Last Drop

Ahh, this picture is one of my very treasure in my collection. Two summers ago, my close friend and I atteneded a yearbook seminar at Seven Springs Ski resort. The little lodges we stayed in provided this complimentary tea that contained some kind or amount of sugar that made you crazy-go-nuts. We were up until the early morning doing layouts for the dummy yearbook and laughing at about anything we saw. Needless to say, the tea didn't help, but I still took a picture of it.

A Cup O' Tea

There's nothing like waking up in the morning and not wanting to drag yourself out of bed into 9 degree weather. It's a real thrill ride and one of my favorite sensations to feel in the morning as you uncover the warm blankets from you cozy nook in the bed and bundle up for the weather you greet with a chill and a shiver. Oh, I also forgot to mention that this paragraph suffers from total opposites disease.

Aside from getting up at the crack of dawn (which is true, I saw the sunrise today which was quite splendid and I actually did enjoy that part) and freezing my petute (bottom) on the way to class, I soon was warmed by the heat of the library. It brought me back to the school days my senior year when I had a study hall first period. Yes, I know, you are all extremely jealous. I loved it. I bonded with friends, finished up homework, and best of all, had my morning cup of tea.

Tea isn't my drinking sensation like coffee of latte's or something java-licous. I'm actually not into the whole "coffee craze" so to speak. I just like the smell. But in the morning at school I would put on the hot water in our librarians office and make myself a good cup o' tea with about 4 spoonfuls of sugar. That's what got me through the day, and to the bathroom as well. Those were the days...

Now I'm in college and I don't really have time for tea. I usually crave it in the morning because it's a morning drink for me. When I'm tired but I need to stay awake and ready, I put on a cup of tea and drink it. This morning I decided to grab some English spice of tea and treat myself, it's only a dollar. After adding about 4-5 packets of pure sugar, I headed off across campus to my next class. I tried to sip it on the way but at the first contact of tea my tongue did a retreat back into the corner of my mouth making a whimpering sound from it's 3rd degree burn. Funny how snow that sometimes makes you mumble and grumble can soon turn into something you desire to dive your head into and lick frantically when your tongue was touched my liquid fire.

The tea was alright and kept me awake in my Intro to Mass Media class. Today was another round of rambling and bits and pieces of information. Did you know West Virginia has a higher literacy rate than Pennsylvania? I know Sharon and Melonie would like that one, especially since the Media loves to pick on the state for being a cruel stereotype of hicks with a huge stick of hay in their mouth with overalls. Back to the matter at hand, the tea was best after class and I got down to the bottom where the sugar had settled. Now I'm on a sugar rush (it doesn't take much) and my fingers are shaking.

Oh tea, you gotta to love it.

"You are my hiding place; you will preserve me from trouble; you will compass me about with songs of deliverance." Pslam 32:7

Gotta love the rubber duckie.

Gather 'round, kiddies

The one great thing about my 8 o'clock class is that it requires very little thought. For instance, today he spoke to us the first ten minutes of class and assigned us read in our little journal/book for the rest of the class. Needless to say, the reading took about 10 mintues and then the rest of the time was for our pleasure. Luckily, we are in a computer lab so I had the oppritunity to catch up on everyone's blogs and then some.

From that class, I head on over to Intro to Mass Communications. At first, I wondered if this class would be a challenge or drag because of the time of morning and the fact that my day starts at 7:30 in the morning. Thank the good Lord I live in the buidling I do because if I were anywhere else, I'd be doomed to prepare for a 20 mintue walk to get to the other end of campus.

Anyway, back to the matter at hand, my Mass Communications class professor reminds me of an ornory, grumpy, yet humorous and somewhat perverted old man who has nothing better to do but to show up and talk to students about things going on in the world. It really does pass time. He talks in such a manner and tone that I almost feel I am sitting on the floor, indian style, and he sits in a rocking chair with a pipe puffing into the air and reminciing of the tales of old and telling little wisdom to his listeners. Even his appearance matches the description of the sterotype I've placed upon him. His face is long with lines and folds and when he speaks little accumilations of spit gather in the corner of his mouth, almost as if he was foaming and frothing like my grandfather would because he would never stop talking. Never.

Not only is this guy older, cranky, but the peverse part is quite frightening but funny at the same time. Every now and then he rants about pronography on the internet and the scandelous things going on in the media. He also tends to pick out new people every day in the class and targets odd questions out to them. Today I sat in the second row, which is pretty much the first since the rest of the class always prefers the back of the room to avoid ridicule. I knew very well that I was in striking range and if he catches you talking or laughing at something he said, he'll ask you about it.

For instance, he started talking to a student who has an older brother who had him as a teacher in college and was wondering how he was doing. Then he preceeded to dwell into the matter of his brother and this girl he thought he would marry. He was questioning the poor sister on why she hasn't yet fixed him up. She was clueless and everyone laughing. By no means was she insulted, she was chuckling too.

I then started to laugh and caught eye contact with him. He then decided to ask me if I had ever heard of this problem but I just said no and let the conversation end quickly to avoid anything else. Then he started getting off topic, as usual, and decided to talk about how my generation is staying at home till they are 30 years old. He refered to these people as "twixers" or something unfamiliar to me like that. Then he asked me if I was going to be a "twixer" when I graduated college.

"No, no." Simple, smart, and straight-forward.

"Ahh, you, I bet your parents love you and want to keep you till you're 40 if they could." He remarked.

I just smiled and laughed. Maybe the innocent face that I hold from looking very premature of being in college has finally paid off. Now the impression people get is not innocent and adorable. I can live with that. haha.

Other than that news, it's a frozen tundra in Edinboro and I've decided to hibernate unless prompted to go to class. The flu is leaving me but I'm still congested. Oh joy. Better start getting to work in class here.

Au Revoir, mes amis.

"And he will teach us of his ways, and we will walk in his paths." Isaiah 2:3

This is a photo I found on a NASA website that really caught my eye. It almost takes me somewhere I've never been but at the same time I feel as if I'm at the beach and loving every minute of it. Too bad I'm not a beach dweller, my fair completion would be roast beef if I were.

The Daily Ramblings

Unlike the exciting lives of Sharon or Melonie or even Aussie Mama, my day was pretty ordinary and well, maybe boring. I don't know. I'll just spit out what when on for today.

It snowed in Edinboro (great gasp to audience) (then the sarcasm hits them). But the fact of the newly fallen snow didn't even catch our attention as much as the temperatures of single digits. "Le Brrr" as my father would say.

Classes were typical and I almost became quite sleepy in a few at times. I credit this to the Advil Flu medication I have been taking to ward off whatever bug jumped on me last night. My head still is a bit dizzy and achy, but I think the sleep overnight really helped me out. Just don't remind me of tomorrow's 8 o'clock class.

Hmm, what else? Typical worrying and pondering about all sorts of things, you know, the ones like "Where will I be in three years?" or "What shall I have for dinner?", you know, those life threatening questions. Haha.

All in a day's work for the most part. Sometimes I feel that I wasted the day and I should have used it in a more productive manner, but then again, all I really want to do right now is lay around, read a bit, and then nap.

I hope you all have a very happy and productive day! Keep warm!

Memory Lane

This is a picture I took two summers ago of my Grandparent's house that is just down the road from me. They raised most of the family of 10 in this home. Really, it's amazing the thing hasn't burnt down/falling over/ et cetera because the place is so old. I've decided to post this nice and warm, green picture on a cold, white and snowy day. Enjoy!

"Mr. Yellow Rubber Ducky reporting for duty!"

I recieved a call this afternoon from the computer saint. His first words to me were:

"Mr. Yellow Rubber Ducky reporting for duty!"

I knew what this meant. This meant that my computer was up and running. The last backround wallpaper I had on my computer was an adorable and innocent rubber ducky. I decided to post it because of the rainy weather we were having up at school.

It looks like the program I tried installing was telling my computer to go back to the stone age, or in the computer's view, B.C. But due to the Windows restore points, all was salvaged along with upgrades on my virus protection and spybot and ad-aware programs. The little bugger will be picked up on my way back to school tomorrow night and it looks like I will have my computer for the week. Only this time around I will be more cautious and keep everything pristine and perfectly healthy to aviod ANY MISHAP whatsoever.

Owh. How 'bout them Stellers???

Black and Gold Shines Once Again

The Steelers celebrate their exhilarating 20-17 win over the New York Jets thanks to the toe of Jeff Reed in overtime. This dynamic game puts the Steel City season record at 16-1, one of the greatest starts in Blitzburgh history. Let's go Steelers!

Liar, Liar

I love it when corporations lie to you. It's a comforting feeling when you figure it out that you've been "punk'd" and a business that is sucking down dollars like an alcoholic on New Years Eve has cheated you once again. Don't you feel the same warm feeling?

Of course, that reeks of sarcasm but the dirty news tis true: Dell lied to me. Over the phone, they gave me a quick fix, one-stop solution to my computer shut down issue: "I have a virus". Today I was phoned by the computer saint and he informs me of good news and bad news. But the great news was the two facts that signified that I didn't have a hardware problem, which would result in lots of green stuff that would require me to start on a great quest for a money tree, and it's not a virus. His Norton Anti-Virus scanned my system and came up with nothing. Unless there is the 1% chance I caught the latest virus within days, Dell seems to be hiding their dirty little computer screen face at me. They wanted to re-install windows and erase all my memory on a whim and have me pay forty dollars for it. No way, Jose.

Now it appears he is going back in time in the computer's history from re-start points and trying to see what happened when I installed "The Living Word Bible". Hopefully there is luck because spending a week without my computer seems impossible and quite dull. I'll be forced to read all the time and live like an Amish gal.

I like cows but I don't do horses. Those things are huge! Too many instances where me and horse did not meet eye to eye. Last time I checked the Amish still don't have health insurance, so I think I'll make friends with Bessie.

Toodles!

Varoom!

What sucks around Rose 418? Yes, my computer crashing, but this little vacuum cleaner I recieved from mother for Christmas is much better! That bugger sucks like a a son of a gun and picks up about anything while at the same time being very light, moveable, and quiet. I barely got it out of the house for mom was trying to keep it for herself she became so in love with the item.

Blue Screen of Death

For Christmas this year Dad bought me a computer program called "The Living Bible". This program holds over 30 different translations of the bible along with daily devotional and all kinds of other interesting and fun information. I decided to install the program onto my PC Wednesday night for lack of anything better to do. It’s the beginning of a new semester- you get bored a bit more often that usual.

After the entire installation was complete, I was notified by my computer that I needed a re-start to completely finish the process. Okay, click and wait. As I chatting to Wuvor on the phone, the computer did its job and began to re-start. Or I thought.

I was sitting on my desk and talking about the day when I glanced over at my precious little humming machine that I use all day long- whether it be for the weather in the morning, schoolwork, or recreation for talking to pals all over the state. I glanced over and that’s when I saw it.

The blue screen of death.

STOP: c00000012 {Fatal System Error} Blah blah blah…..The system has been shut down.

Oh…dear….no. I read it over and over again trying to comprehend what had just happened. All of a sudden my happy and, what I thought was, healthy computer took a nose dive into technological cardiac arrest. When you have a computer and you are welcomed by the blue screen of death, you’ve found something you never wanted to encounter- well, death!

I frantically yelled Roomie’s name in hope that she would have the quick fix for my doom of blue. She built her own computer with her boyfriend. They know all the parts, gizmos, and gadgets. I am learning, but I know little compared to her; so I called upon her expertise. She fiddled and looked into the one page you can access by F2. Nothing appeared to be wrong to her.

Well, I freaked. It’s a brand new computer! I bought it August 20th, 2004 for school. It’s not even a yearling and it’s already biting the dust. Sure, I know things don’t last long in the world of science and new technology, but this is quite premature, especially for someone as poor as I am that can’t afford to repair.

I started with calling Dell the next day to report the case and seek help. I was hoping that my warranty was still in effect and hopefully they could come and fix my problem free of charge. I gave them one of my arms and legs, they should try to compensate.

After going through about 3 oriental over-the-phone technicians they reported to me three things:
I had a three month warranty when I bought the machine. This translates into what I call “Crap out of luck”.
The problem that has occurred is most likely due to a virus that was activated when I re-booted my system. (Dell’s quick line to solve the problem).
To now get any further assistance for re-installing windows and losing all my memory on my computer, I would have to pay a fee starting at $39.99

Let’s just say that after the last nine I decided to tell them I was going to “think about it”. I did. A few seconds went by and I decided that I wasn’t going to pay that to them when I know a computer saint. He’s a close friend of my father’s that is a brain when it comes to hard drives, Windows, and all that fun computer knowledge. This past summer our computer was attacked our home computer with a virus and brought to its knees until he came to the rescue and helped us out.

I dropped the tower off at his house for him to work on this afternoon. I told him to take his time and gave him my sincerest appreciation for doing such a noble thing. He either believes it has to do with the hardware or a virus. A virus is my guess. So now my only hope is a miracle.

Now without my little computer of glow and hum, I have to ask Roomie about the weather every morning and result to using the labs if I need anything done. I can’t write e-mails to Wuvor and I can’t talk to my buddies. I can’t blog, I can’t read the blogs…I feel so weak! Just as long as my computer is ok…I can do without it because I have faith in this guy. Maybe this is God’s way of telling me to get off the computer a little bit, haha. How ironic.

I’d like to find the person who sent this virus. I cannot put in detail what I would do to him, or any virus creator at that, but it’s too graphic for blogs that can be posted on the internet.

Have a happy and humming day!

The Lilly Pad

Here's the old homestead in Edinboro!

Mirror, Mirror, on the wall...

I love getting mail, especially when I get a little yellow card in my mailbox indicated that I have received something that is too big for my mailbox. I then take that slip and give it to the mail clerk during their office hours and receive my present from Post Master General. Usually, its junk mail; but this time it’s been graphic design junk mail.

I don’t know who gave them my number or address or even my name, but all of a sudden this semester I am receiving mail from design companies from all over the country out the butt. Some think I am a hopeful client and others are schools that are trying to wheel me into their university.

No thanks, one culture shock is enough for me, at least for awhile. I just got comfy and put my feet up in Edinboro. Besides, these schools are in California and New York. Do I look like Felicity?

But the downside of getting this mail is what it does to me psychologically. I take a leaf through what I receive and their brochure. That’s when my mind takes me for a joy ride of suspense and fear, doubt and worry, and other crazy ventures that cause me to act like a big turtle- pull the limbs in and wait out the storm.

“What if I’m not good at this…”

What if I can’t do this…”

“What if I don’t like it…”

Hmm…and that’s only the beginning. From there I go into deeper thought and analyze myself once again. I’m not super artistic like some people on campus. I don’t have the dyed hair with the patches on coats and random and weird piercing. I’m not super talented or born for arty stardom. I inquired my roommate about the packaged mail she received. It was a brochure for the school she wanted to go to in Ohio that is six hours from her house. She read me the list of classes they take, many more than here and they seem more “sophisticated” and “upper-level”, but it is far too expensive for her so she declines her admission to go there. Besides, the gang of pals (including) has told her she isn’t leaving here anyway. We would punish her, haha. And I would be without a roommate and subject to who knows what horrors.

But back to the matter at hand, she spoke of a friend who attended the university that took a trip to a year in Italy. I said “Wow” and she said “I know”. I pondered a bit and then asked “Would you go if you could?” and she replied “Of course!” Hence lays my other personality defect in life.

I’m a home slice.

I don’t want to be super artsy; I don’t want to travel the world right now in search for my graphic design studies either. I’m not a design guru, at least not yet. I’m still sticking my toe in the water and swooshing it around to see if I like the temperature before I take a dive in. I plan to stay in the state of PA until majorly prompted and get a job I like that isn’t super demanding and weird; if I can get a job at all. I fear I’ll be the next unemployed art hobo on the streets of Las Vegas! My roommate can spend hours and hours in front of a computer and not even take in any side effects whereas I can spend a lot of time the old hummer but too much makes my eyes hurt and I get a small case of the crazies, hence the possibility of a communication minor so I get a little bit more of an edge to the whole field. At the same time I want to be a home slice and be in the country, to be normal, to settle down, and to just be me.

Plus, the fact of leaving wuvor for such a long period of time would unravel me. I can’t imagine being six hours away from him, even a whole entire year! Two hours does havoc on my heart and nerves. It’s sad to say but…I am a suitcase college junkie. That means…I come home every weekend. I have stayed up here three weekends so far, but due to some changing events, it looks like I might be spending a bit more time up here than I expected. I don’t go home to see the grass grow green; I come home to see wuvor. Hopefully I can help him get into a school to use that smart noodle upstairs in his brain, even if it costs us some together time because I care about his future. Besides, he has a car and he could drive and visit me and I visit him (somehow). I don’t know. That’s a long ways off.

Sometimes I get this mail and feel like I want to move home and have an ordinary job with a family, house, dog and a cool vacuum (I already have one of those, and it really sucks.) (Bad joke.)

Is it the world playing with my head that is trying to turn me into something I am not? Some trendy and expensive woman who wears black outfits and has thin glasses who wears high heels and clicks everywhere she goes or the computer junkie living out of an apartment in the basement in the city or the average day designer with a communication touch with a firm and doing her job and having a good time?

Currently I am taking an Intro to Computer Software course that I am enjoying. Other people I know say I’d be great for what I am majoring in. I’m so confused I don’t want to do anything artsy, not even the reading I have to do in my QuarkXPress book for class. Sometimes I wish I was dropped a hint on where to go so I know I couldn’t fail.

Later gators.

8 o'clock world

Since Sharon started her blog off with a song, I will be a sneaky copycat and do the same, only mine his slightly changed to fit what I am writing about. 5 o'clock world, not 8 o'clock, would be the song, and I can't remember the name of the artist for some reason (if you are dying to know, call up my music encycopedia mother).

Anyway, I am here in my college research and writings class which starts at the crack of dawn (in my world): 8:00AM. Why did I schedule such an idiotic thing when I'm by far a person to be considered a early riser? My roommate insisted upon the choice because I take the class with her. Plus, it gets me one step ahead on going out of Edinboro on Fridays (I know, what a bad girl I am) and the class is, well, easy.

My roommate had the splendid opportunity to leave class early today have 8:10. Since she had him last semester, she could leave since the professor already knows her writing style and such. I didn't, so I was forced to stay and whimper as my partner left.

It's really not that bad yet. I am trying to get enough sleep before the day greets me and keeping on my toes. Who knows what today will bring? I'm off to Intro to Mass Media. I wonder what Chandler will grumble today...hmm.

Good morning ya'll!

Noodle Doodle

After a complete shut down of my academic world and my only means of education coming from the Animal Planet on cable television, I have been forced to kick my brain into the next gear for the new semester is upon me and is knocking at my door holding a basket full of 18 credits and cute little snow booties.

The day is done and all of my six classes have been introduced to me. Some came with a smiling face, a laugh, and a welcomed sigh of relief on my nerves and others stared at me with a blank face, flared their nostrils, and pouted in the chair. All in all, my analysis of the semester at hand is like a referee after the red towel has been thrown by Coach Cowher- I need further review.

I don’t know how I will sum up my classes until weeks go by. My old pattern has been kicked out the window but I am recovering nicely for several reasons. One of them being that I have grown up quite a bit and the whole college thing isn’t rocking my socks off this time around. Same place, same room, same roomie, and good old snow. All those challenges I had last semester are gone this time around. I’ve come out a littler stronger, a bit smarter, and thankfully, not that much fatter.

All in all, I think this semester will be a bit of a challenge but won’t be too bad. Of course I’ll have those days when things are tumbling down around me and stuff is causing me to freak, but I need to be strong and assertive. I do predict more work this time around and I sure don’t predict another 3.7, but I will try my best to stay out of the C’s in into the B’s and, maybe if a miracle is laying around and there is a sale, some A’s to decorate the final report card with.

In other epic news on campus, one of my friend’s roommate, who never was in the room and didn’t even make a Spring 05 semester schedule, has disappeared. He left for break and hasn’t returned, leaving my friend speechless and leaving roomie and I scoping out what he has that we can put dibbs on.

I always wanted my own iron and board…

We have changes in the hall this semester to come back to as far as RA’s are concerned. Our last Resident Assistant from the other side of the hall was moved to Earp Hall for several reasons I will not bring up and get into, but now we have a new lady here to take her place. She seems to be quite a rule enforcer but I do not fear her because I live on the opposite side of the hall, so therefore, I don’t really see her, so she can’t see me, and she can’t see our super cool pizza sign that lights up but has a Budweiser logo on it with a beer mug and bottle and it is now somewhat illegal to have displayed because is “promotes alcohol”. It’s not hanging out the window for the entire world to see, first off, so what harm does it do? Roomie and I are far from being drinkers anyway, let alone party animals. We like the warm orange glow of the pizza part of the sign, not the intoxicating message a pizza sign seems to send now and days. Let me have my sign- she would only write me up because she probably wants one too. But no worries, I have a blanket I can throw on it incase of emergency. And a door to shut. Perfecto.

There is snow in Edinboro. There is flooding in West Virginia. Weather lately is crazy-go-nuts. But the waters will recede and someday I might see grass again. Enjoy your January day and have a cup of cocoa!

Grumble Mumble

Ever stick your foot in your mouth? Ever want to go back in time and re-direct the actions and words of the past because it just didn't come out right?

Today is my day to find a vehicle that takes me back to the future.

So here's the deal. I know, this story will sound quite school girlish because of the confusing back anf forth, but I have to vent somewhere.(For internet security, I'll use code names.)

Susie is a friend that I went to high school with and we both wanted to keep in touch after our ways parted from high school to college life. We thought we would have a shopping outing in the morning before I went little party for my close friend's sister (Sszie would not attend the party.) The shopping would be in the morning, the party was just 2 hours at night and many people I would get to see before break was over. Perfect.

Then the Maybury disease came upon me. Every time my relatives come home, a dog dies, car breaks down, things break...you get the picture. This time they brought illness with them as a Christmas gift. How kind. Too bad they kept the receipt and went home.

Now I was left sick, unable to speak for a long period of time, and too tired and medicated to make sense of anything. I called Susie on the telephone and explained my health status and told her we would reschedule for next weekend sometime. I figured this plan would work: I would still go to the party at night but it is only two hours and doing two events in one day would be hard. I already gave my RSVP to the party because it was presented to me first. Plus, our trip was early in the morning and I hadn't been sleeping well at all, not to mention the fact that we couldn't be girly and chit chat because of my voice. Yet I didn't tell Susie about the party plans because she wasn't invited and I didn't want to be the bearer of bad news.

Everything seemed to work out so far. I got to sleep a little more than four hours, and conserve energy for the one event on Saturday. Until Susie called and was going to come out to my house to visit. Then I told her the news of the party. Me, being dense and heavily medicated, didn't see what she felt or how she sounded on the phone. We made plans to see each other after the short party and exchange holiday gifts.

The party was good, but it wasn't that great. I got to see some people before I went back to Edinboro for school, but even the little talking I did for two hours had me in misery by the end of the night. I called Susie to see if she would meet us at the end of the road to go to her boyfriend's house (since they were nearby and she was with him) but she said she'd get it to me another time.

Then I check my mail.

I have offended Susie by what I did. It angered her I was too sick to shop with her but not sick enough to go to a party. I sent her back a reply stating all the reasoning I thought I had about the time frame, sickness, etc. but it all seemed like excuses and now I was in trouble.

These little things in life make me tired, almost as if I am trying to entertain everyone on the planet and keep them happy. I know this is impossible and most of the time not true, but I like to be at peace with everyone I know. I can't lose Susie because she's such a good friend. I already lost my best friend since high school, I don't need another loss.

Sorry for this lamenting blah blah blah blog today. On a brighter note, I am being quite savy when it come to book buying for the new semester and bought 4 books online saving me $70.00. But I am still anxious about when they will come in and the other classes I have yet to be introduced to. In addition to my savy spending, I finally accessed my grades from the last semester and I was shocked. My mouth practically hit the floor. It appears I finished out with a QPA of 3.7, surpassing the limit for Dean's List, which is 3.4 something. I am shocked, honored, but I feel like I didn't deserve it, or did I? I'm not sure. I'll believe it when I get something in the mail.

Have a terrific and warm day!

"Oh butler, more grapes please..."

When I read Melonie's comment, it was almost erie in a way. John came out here for the day and, well, I got babied. There was extra affection and questions and such gibber gabber. I didn't have to say anything (I can't, I only whisper now when I have to) and he was there for me. It got me thinking...maybe I should get sick more often!

Medicene has been bought. The vapor machine has been plugged in. I fear I won't be able to sleep and go through the same senerio as last night. But mom failed to tell me about the sleeping pills we have here.

Come to mama.

(If all else fails, of course).

(I blog often on here these days. But treasure it while it lasts, I head back to EUP Sunday)

Nighty night!

Night of the Vocally Dead

Last night was just plain terrible. I took a benadryl to see if that would loosen my throat any at all so I could sleep peacefully and soundly without any discomfort. I think not. I decided to turn in for bed at midnight, and to tell you the honest truth, I never fell asleep until 6:00AM.

It really sucks. I tried salt water, the vaporizer, a dose of Vicks 44 on top of the benydryl, and yes, even honey. I got quite attached to the stuff last night because of the temporary relief it gave and it suppressed the coughing. My main problem was that I couldn't swallow, therefore, I was in misery. Every time I got close to drifting off to slumber land, I was thrown into a coughing spell and had to take another drink, another dab of honey, adjust pillows, and try all over again.

I finally pulled out the big guns at around 2:00. I got mom. I know, it sounds childish, but I wanted my mom. She knows what to do and I wanted to see what was living in my throat that was causing so much trouble. It was irritating me to the point where my stomach couldn't handle it. Luckily, it is only red swolleness; not the case this past summer when I had the "mystery virus". I feared that the most. The doctor told me it looked like mono. Heck no. I'm so glad that's not the case.

What really sucks is that I can't talk at all and I was going to go shopping tomorrow with a high school friend. Bummer. I left her a voice mail and will see how the day unfolds. Movies, some food, and lounging around...in silence. That is my exciting Friday.

Have a terrificly vocal day!

Excusez-moi?

I just read my brother's blog and noticed he commentedand used the words "suck it up".

May I remind the audience that when he was sick with the flu at Christmas and I recommended taking vitamins, he claims the vitamins made him sick when he took them last time. Therefore, he's not taking them again. Oh, and for using the vapor maching to help this clogged nose? He refused to do that too. And all you ladies out there reading this know how men are when it comes to illnesses. As the french say "Ils sont bebe".

So, in conclusion...suck it up.

Touche.

Before you mess with a sister, think back to all the black mail she has on you.

...muhaha.

Come Again?

I'm glad that my blog uses written words and not spoken. It appears that the "illness" I am suffering has taken another stab at my throat and now I can barely speak at all. The pain is tolerable but talking has become much more difficult that yesterday. Of course, I worked today and was the butt of my jokes, many of which I responded with a "whisper laughed". I tried to do all the odd jobs in the world to stay of register and keep my voice in a somewhat reparable condition. After too many customers, I was just worn out. I even took the intelligent steps of deleting simple phrases I say to be extra talky and kind to people like "Here's your receipt" or something along those lines. Sure, I have energy in my body, but when it came to that last customer, it was all I could do to say "Have a nice day". By the end of the night, I talked to my co-workers with hand signs and pointing.

I still blame Sharon.

(I'm just kidding. I think it was my fungi, germ-loving brother who brought Mr. Throatstabber home to meet me.)

But on a brighter side, Office worker and SNS mama Christine was working and was very sympathetic about the entire situation. She left me go home an hour early and helped me figure that I could take tomorrow off. They have plenty of help if they need it. I need to stay home so I can stay away from the hospital so the hospital can stay far, far away from my wallet.

I feel pretty good as far as ambition. I mean, I got about 11 hours of sleep last night. I love vacation.

What do you think my illness is? Try my quiz and take a guess!(I changed it from the SNS one to this question. More interesting.)

Have a wonderful and very vocal day (to make up for me).

Hot and Steamy Dreams

Sure, I know what you are thinking, and no, I did not dream about James the firefighter. (Hey, if Aussie Mama can't think about him, someone has to! Poor Aussie Mama.) No, no dreams about James in a hot, red firefighting suit riding on a enormous shined and polished truck; it was just a weird dream as I slept under very hot and steamy covers of the fantastic polar fleece blankets I got for Christmas from Daddy. Besides, this house never drops down to a degree past 75 in the winter.

I'm still sick and this mysterious illness has evolved into something quite strange indeed. I can't talk like a normal cashier. Instead I'm the cashier from the crypt who sounds like the hand of time just took out her voice box when I go on the PA system to ask for a void or assistance. But onto the bright side, the throat doesn't hurt as much as it did. It's only at night when the disease comes out to play... I went to John's last night after work ended (not soon enough) and we did nothing but hang around and watch TV. It was truly laziness at its best. But I did get caught up on my Everybody Loves Raymond episodes while John was caught up as he took a nap nap in between things.

I have been drinking the elixir of life; also know as orange juice, like another hurricane was going to hit Florida all over again. The stuff makes my throat feel great. I'm just hoping that all the vitamins, Vicks vapor rub, OJ, sleep, and hand washing doesn't it's part in kicking out this vocal demon. We don't have medical insurance because of Dad's job change. All of a sudden I feel like I've been thrown back into the 1800's- no cure, no medicine, you're only left to suffer and croak. Ouch.

So I came home last night and decided to hit the hay and sleep instead of staying up another hour or so to blog and read other people's blogs. (Do I have an addiction?) (I can credit that to Sharon. She got me in the blogging mess.) Back to the matter at hand, I went to bed and slept restlessly all night between the cat constantly peering out my window at odd times of the morning when no creature is out that she can pounce on and devour and the drooling I did because, well, I don't know. I just drooled like crazy. It's like I can't swallow at night now. Terrific. Even the pets have something up on me. Then may not be able to check out food or read music but at least they don't have to flip their pillow over a few times. I'll stop talking about the drooling; it's all so personal and gross at the same time.

So I decided about nine this morning to put on Vicks to give it a shot. Something needed to help me other than the futile OJ and vitamins. I did and went back to sleep tot he dripping rain that has been falling all night, quite soothing to me. And boy, did I ever go back to sleep. I went farther than that, I went on an epic adventure.


It all started with someone instructing me on what to do. I was thrown into a video game like atmosphere where the object was to squeeze a person with both my arms as tight as I could and then I got a point. The more people I could squeeze, the better. But I had to watch out because the individuals were somewhat aware of the threat I posed. They too were trying to squeeze everyone. I started the process and was dropped down into the game. There now weren't any demographics or anything of the sort. Instead I started squeezing. My first victim was an old school mate the played trombone with me. She got the ax first. Then I moved on towards someone who was lurking in the shadows that I started to put my hands around before I even saw their face. To my grand surprise, it was Mrs. Hilty, my old English teacher, and we really tangled. Her little bones and permed hair put up a good fight as we wrestled on the ground. Eventually, I won the match, and earned it quite frankly.

From there I moved into a room that appeared to be the location of the book fair of some kind. People swarmed everywhere. I didn't really concentrate on my mission for I was too consumed with interest with all the books and looking to see if they had any I could pick up for John since he loves to read. But the game continued and I moved onto a bus that looked more like a subway on land. There were people everywhere in seats moving around and chatter was quite loud. But there I met up with me team. It consisted of two males and another female that had blond hair. I did not look like myself; I had short, dark brown hair and a very round face. But I was the main character and I looked pretty cool. Then teachers started coming through the isles and soon I recognized Mr. Rusinski, my old bio teacher. I decided to try to squeeze him and defeat him but he proved to me quite strong instead and defeated me. Then I had a cupcake that was taken away. (It must have been the punishment for losing to someone, for I knew nothing of the cupcake until now.)

Then people laughed and things took to a dark side. Strict leaders came on board and now it was a desperate attempt to escape this bus of doom and run as fast as you can far away. My team escaped and headed towards a big red barn on the side of the road that has posted 2 horses. We dashed quickly down the hill and tried to be as discreet as possible but in the end the enemies were hot on our trail. Soon our two male friends were captured and the female heroine's were off running into the woods. For some reason, though, I couldn't run fast, it was almost as like a weight was dragging me. I couldn't run fast enough. My blond partner was ahead of me but she too was falling behind. Everything was in slow motion. I headed up towards the road where traffic was started to clog up and hoped I could hop on a car to speed away. Unfortunately, I was caught, along with my partner, and we were forced to drag this huge metal machine on the highway. It was our punishment. Then I woke up.

I didn't even take medication to make that dream so wacky. It could have possibly been the vapors but something made that dream really wacky. But it was better than the night before- people were dying.

Ok, so I need a dream interpreter. But frankly, I don't care about what it means; I just like the stunning action of it. Now I'm off to hang around some more until work. Yes, work at 3:30 to 10:00. Sheer bliss.

Enjoy your day!

Arg...you got me...

I went to bed last night feeling a little under the weather, but it was so rainy last night that being under the weather would be quite a task. Anyway, I got my shower, brushed my teeth with extra attention (for I fear a sore throat is coming on) ad took my vitamins with a large glass of orange juice. (My favorite drink.)

I have awoken to nothing different.

Sure, the drink makes me feel a whole lot better, but if I get sick, this is just going to royally suck because it's the tail end of my Christmas vacation. Where could I have picked this up at? Hmm...maybe I'll go undercover as a top dog professional in CSI- "catching something icky".

My first suspect:

1. My brother- yes, he's big, he's unsanitary, and he's a pro at this germ spreading technique. He was sick when he came home from Slippery Rock and then gave the good tidings and joy to my mother for the holidays. Am I the next victim? Possibly, since I'm on his case all the time about hygiene since we share a bathroom.
2. Shop n' Save- From touching rewards cards on dirty key rings to scrubbing down the registers and handling people's filthy money, it's no wonder I'm not sick already. But my handy dandy Bath and Body works germ killer I always keep in my smock has always keep me safe. Could it have left me down this time?
3. Sharon- She's been deathly ill, as her blog says, and she too had a sore throat (but her's turned into strep.) (Never had it, but I was close this past summer.) She may have passed this cursed disease through blogging territory. What if she is a threat, she could have infected so many others! Yet we are family, maybe it's just in the blood. Hmm....I'll keep my eye on her....ooo, look, shiny object...
4. John- John? We've never caught an illness off each other in our dating history. Last spring, around prom time (great timing, eh?) he became the sickest I've ever seen him. He lost about 10 pounds off his scrawny little body and did nothing but lay around and sleep. Lately he has been sleeping like crazy and getting about 10 hours a day. Maybe he is turning into a cat...or turning into a viral time bomb waiting to spread rampantly to everyone he sees!

Hmm...There are many clues but no strong leads. I think I'll pass the case to Mr. Orange Juice Glass and his assistants vitamin C & E to do his inside dirty work.

This came on a very bad day for I have things planned to do before I work at 1:30. But now that I have contacts in and my drink of choice, I guess I will stay up. Number 4 suspect called me about 9:17 to ask for the number of his workplace because he got a flat tire. (Yes, and the tires and brand new.) Now I'm off to attempt the tasks to today and then check out Suspect number 2's groceries. Joy.

Have a terrific and worry free day!

Lord of the Worry Warts

I've decided it. I've reached a decision. I worry far too much.

I know what you're thinking "Oh, come now. You're so young. Why worry? Life is at your fingertips."

Yes, life is at my fingertips. I just can't get ahold of the steering wheel because the road of life is covered in black ice and my car is careening out of control towards a cliff that is the edge of a huge canyon!

Does stress bring worry? Who knows. But here's what Lindsay K. worrys about for something to do. And I can't sew or knit so therefore, no new hobby to pick up to entertain my wondering mind from daydreaming, or day"worrying" I should call it.

1. My Future: I fear the worst. When I first started school and was shocked to find I was required to take all these art courses, I jumped to the conclusion that I was the next New York City art hobo. Now I fear I'll hate my job, my career, the money that I'm pouring into Edinboro. What if I don't size up? Ahhh!

2. School: I have an 8:00 class and 18 credits. I might get a job, but the likelyhood of that is rare. I also have to go back and adjust to not seeing John every or everyother day. Boo for that.

3. My Old Best Friend: I've lost my best friend this year. The string has been cut, the gashes are trying to heal; but everytime I think about it, I pick the scab and I begin to bleed again. I began the August of 2003 when she began dating a guy that lead me on for 6 months, ditched me, and decided his heart was for her. I left them go and be happy, despite the tears and loniless. But things happened. people change, and now I'm hear and I've seen her once over break, not even planned. My old best friend didn't even say a word about Grandpa dying, no card, call, hug, nothing. That seems to be the final stab. It hurts the most. I feel like it's my fault but other's tell me it's not. I try to block out everything and move on but I'm hung up on it.

4. Realtionships: I worry about John and I. I've realized what a pain I can be him sometimes with all this worrying I blabber on into his ear. I worry about the dumbest stuff when it comes to us. He actually is helping me get over that.

2004 was crazy-go-nuts. I got a boy, graduated, went off to college, lost a best friend, many loved ones passed away, and my comfort zone was kicked and proded beyond comprehension.

I guess I should make a list of resolutions (Just for the sake of the New Year):

1. Do more for God. Send more cards. Love people. Seek God more.
2. STOP WORRYING!
3. Become a better girlfriend
4. Be me and love it, no matter what anyone things.

There are probably more...but oh well. Wait, I forgot one (and I'll end this dreary blog with a happy note because I hate this pouring out of blah.)

5. Help Val after college at home doing whatever I can for her from scrubbing her bathroom and cleaning her house, walking Jack the dog, or even cleaning her pool because...

...there's a baby on the way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Hi, my name is Lindsay, and I'm an alcoholic, partying cashier."

In a world of palm pilots, schedule books, reminders, fax machines, copies, cell phone, and the internet, I am still surprised at the amount of people that apparently forgot it was New Year’s Eve and decided to go get groceries…all at once.

I knew it would be a rigorous day of scanning, bagging, and money transactions when I was forced to park at the end of the parking lot for lack of having any luck at finding a better spot. As I made my way through the sliding doors it was evident that is was sheer madness. All seven registers open for business that were already packed with people, making long lines of inpatient customers who wants to go home and drink, whether it be the sparkling grape juice by Welch’s or the bubbly stuff that’s sold down a few store at the beer distributor.

Yesterday my forehead must have been labeled with a bright red tattoo of some sort that went something like “alcoholic” or “party animal.” Why is that? Well, elderly shoppers were at their best yesterday making a comment that just doesn’t come out right…or did it? Was it their intention to say what they did? I checked out their grub, gave the receipts, and told them to have a nice holiday and in response I got:

“And you have a safe holiday…”

Last time I looked in the bathroom mirror at SNS, I didn’t have any signs that would label me as that kind of person but more towards the opposite end of the spectrum. I guess they failed to notice the cross I wear on my smock or the tiny feet that represents a foundation for premature infants. Maybe they can’t see that far. (I know that was a low blow, but maybe it’s true!)

I asked my fellow co-workers if I looked like the type to go on an all-nighter, lose track of drinks, and wear the dance floor down on a Friday night.

They said yes.

(In a joking manner of course.)

It never ceases to amaze me. People and their words, good golly. But even though I walked out of the shadow of the valley of food with a headache, I soon took some pills and ate out with family and two other family friends. It was a fun night of Cranium and Taboo, Taboo being the all-time favorite from year to year. I hope your holiday rocked your socks and you welcomed 2005 with a happy and sober smile!

I’m out to eat with family in Clarion for the day. Hopefully my hangover is better by the time we get there…haha.